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How to stop floating in life and become the person you want to be

It starts with new year you start thinking by yourself how you going to break out of the bad habits, its going to be different this time you going to achieve the goals that you want to accomplish. But after a few days you are back where you began and not even close to breaking those bad habits.

So the question is?

How do you break free from bad habits and make the habits you desire easier and automatic?

I’m going to answer all those questions.

  • Habit loops

  • Dopamine spikes

  • And changing your environment

Step by step I’m going to learn you how to create the best habits to implement to your life. I hope this blog is going to inspire you to take action and life your best life! Step by step!

Lets jump into it!

Tiny changes in our habits can change the destination in our lives in ways we can’t even notice. In the start you won’t recognize much That’s why people go back to their old habits. But the key is to be consistent and eventually you will see a big spike in your daily life. Don’t expect by excersing 1 week and eating good nutritional food you going to be in good shape and become healthy. This is not the case, the case is to be consistent every day!

Quote: A slight change in your daily habits can guide your life to a very different destination.

We convince ourselves that massive success is only achievable through massive action in any goal we are pursuing. We expect ourselves to make quantum changes to gain others attention. But it’s the tiny changes that aren’t even noticeable at first that make massive IMPROVEMENTS.

1% better every day for a year will compound 37 times better, but 1% worse over a year will bring you close to 0! Your habits can form against you by stress, or negative self talk. And Can help with you in form of skills, relationships and knowledge.

Quote: Success is the product of daily habits not once in a life time transformations.

The truth about progress

Small changes in our progress are not even noticeable, the first weeks of progress are called the valley of disappointment.

You’ve done so much and put in some much effort but you don’t see any results. This is where many people stop and slip back into their old habits. The most powerful outcome to eventually see the progress is PATIENCE! Patience is required!

Goals vs systems

Quote: Forget about goals focus on systems instead.

A goal is something that you want to accomplish, systems deal with processes that lead you to your goals. The best way to achieve anything you want in life, Better health better relationships or a better income or spending more time with family. Is to set realistic goals, But if you completely didn’t pay attention to your goals and only focused on the systems instead would you still succeed? Yes you will succeed! Focus on systems instead of goals!

Here are some problems with only having goals

  • Achieving a goal only changes your life for that moment in time

  • Even you achieve the goal and you succeed or you don’t and you are a failure

  • When you achieve a goal what do you do after? If your goal was to complete a marathon. Chances are your motivation will faith and you will just slip back into your old routines.

Quote: Goals are good for setting a direction, but systems are best for making progress.

A system to change your habits

The problem with changing a habit is not you, reason why you repeat the same bad habits for so long isn’t because you don’t want to change but because you have the wrong system for change.

By making small habits you going to accumulate big positive outcomes overtime. Big breakthroughs tent to get more attention, but what really matters are the little daily decisions and actions we take!

Quote: Small habits are the building blocks of remarkable results

The three layers to behaviour change:

  • Outcomes

The result: Losing that weight, writing that book or winning the season. The outcomes are what you get!

  • Processes

The second layer is changing the process by what you do, your workout routine are developing a daily reading habit.

  • Identity

The third layer is changing your identity, what you believe and how the world sees you and what you think about yourself and others.

Most people focus on the outcomes, but the best way to change your habits is focussing on the person you want to become, instead of the results you want to accomplish. The goal isn’t to learn a instrument but to become a musician. The goal isn’t to finish a marathon but it is to become a runner. When something you want in your life and it becomes part of your identity then it’s when your behaviours start to naturally change. When you tell yourself and others that you are a runner you want to live up to that identity. Remind yourself everytime you do a workout, you are a athlete. Everytime you write a line of code you are a programmer. And each time you instruct your team you are a LEADER!

The habit loop

A habit is something that you do and repeat it many times that it becomes automatic. We want to have habits that solve problems in our lives with the least amount of effort. A habit is created by a form of a continuous feedback loop.

  1. Cue = Message from your phone

  2. Craving = Want to know who messaged

  3. Response = Picking up the phone

  4. Reward = Solve the problem of who messaged.

They key is to create habits that stick and create feedback loops that are continuously are being improved.

  1. Cue = Mind goes blank at work

  2. Craving = Want to eliminate the frustration

  3. Response = Check social media

  4. Reward = Satisfied the need to feel less frustrated

Overtime rewards become associated with Cue’s, So in this example checking social media comes tight to your mind going blank at work. And then checking facebook may become the cue to check Instagram and then maybe the cue to watch youtube. And before you know it your mind going blank has lead you to 30-40 minutes of wasted time! The more you repeat these habit loops the stronger and more automatic they come. Cue can really be anything a smell a sound a person. Try to recognize those cues that enable your bad habit loops.

So how can we make the habit loop so that it works for us instead of against us?

Quote: Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.

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